Childhood Guilt

     I never realized just how much a childhood experience could impact the rest of one's life until I read The Kite Runner. Amir stood by as Hassan, his friend and half brother (though he didn't know it at the time), was brutally raped by a threesome of bullies in Afghanistan. He could have tried to help Hassan, but he chose to run away and try to pretend he saw nothing. Amir paid for this for the rest of his life. The unbreakable bond between Amir and Hassan was broken, never to be repaired. The two stopped talking mainly due to Amir's inability to tackle his own guilt. Hassan moved away and, eventually, Amir ended up in America. It had been years and years since the rape, yet Amir was still an insomniac, still could not think about Hassan. 

     Amir's guilt followed him throughout his entire life until he got the chance to redeem himself by rescuing Hassan's orphaned son, Sohrab. By that time, though, he had been living with the overwhelming guilt of abandoning his friend when Hassan needed him most for nearly twenty five years. I was taken by this. The entire time I read this book I could not get over how much a decision made when one was twelve could bring someone down for so long. I can understand Amir's feeling, just not imagine being in the same situation. It made me realize just how careful one has to be when making decisions even if at the time of the decision it does not seem as if it would be that life altering.